Trapped!
by Green217
Summary: When Donna Noble gets fired from her job, all she wants to do is get home. Unfortunately for her, she becomes trapped. On an elevator. With an alien, an immortal, and a girl who wears WAY too much pink. She really should have taken the stairs... But is there something else going on here? Just who trapped this group? All shall be revealed inside! T for Jack. Elevator AU!
1. The stage is set

**Hello, and welcome! My name's Green217, and I'm new here... ANYWAYS.**

** I really love 'Trapped in an elevator' fics, so I thought I'd give it a go. The characters stuck shall be: Donna Noble, Captain Jack Harkness, Rose Tyler, and one of my favorite doctors, Nine.**

** I mean really, take two of the sassiest people in the Whoniverse, the Bad Wolf, and a flirtatious Captain and put them in an elevator together. **

** What could possibly go wrong?**

** DISCLAIMER OF DOOM: I do not yet own Dr. Who, ****but I'm working on it.**

_Chapter One: The best temp in Chiswick meets Spaceman meets the Handsome Captain meets the Bad Wolf._

Donna was having a bad day. She just got fired from her job for reasons she found to be completely ridiculous, (who fires you for the loudness of your voice?) and was now making the walk of shame to the elevator that lead to the ground floor.

She pressed the down arrow and frowned. _This elevator's always been slow._ She thought spitefully.

It dinged and the doors opened. One other man was inside, but she paid him no heed, pressing the button marked 'G' before the doors closed.

The other man was was tapping his foot impatiently, and kept muttering under his breath. Donna turned to him. _Well now, theres an odd fellow. _She thought as she looked at him.

The man wore a worn leather jacket with a green V neck sweater, some unimpressive jeans and black shoes. All of this seemed out of place for an office building, but what was really out of place were his _ears. _They were gargantuan.

"Can I help you?" He said in a distinctly northern accent. Donna realized she had been staring.

"It's nothing." She said before turning back to the elevator. It dinged again, and two more people stepped inside.

The first was a pretty blond girl who wore to much pink for Donna's tastes, and a handsome man wearing a long coat and suspenders.

The girl nodded to Donna before pushing a button to get to the floor she wanted. The man winked at Leather Jacket and punched a button.

The elevator began to move again with a temperamental groan. Donna frowned at the sound, but Leather Jacket jumped.

"Oi, mate! Don't jump in the elevator!" Donna said. Leather Jacket gave a big smile.

"Shoulda taken the stairs." He said. Donna was about to reply when the elevator screeched to a halt.

"Um... Did the elevator just stop?" Pink said nervously.

"Yes it did! Fantastic!" Leather Jacket said pulling out a silver thingy with a blue tip.

He then proceeded to wave it in the air as it made a whirring nse. Donna failed to see how that was going to help anything, but Leather Jacket seemed adamant.

"Well. We're stuck!" Leather Jacket said a little _too _excitedly.

"Well that's just _lovely _sunshine! How am I supposed to get home _now_?" Donna said irratibly.

Leather Jacket shrugged that stupid smile still on his face. Donna wanted to wipe it off.

"I can't believe this. I'm stuck in an elevator. I thought that only happened on the telly!" Pink said. Then she groaned.

"My mum'll want me to sue." She said.

Hottie clapped his hands getting everyone's attention.

"If we're going to be stuck here, I think we should all tell each other our names." He said with a grin.

"Hello, I'm Captain Jack Harkness." He said looking at Leather Jacket, who seemed annoyed by being singled out.

"I'm The Doctor." He said. Donna looked at him.

"That's not a name." She said. 'The Doctor' frowned.

"It's my name." He said. Donna rolled her eyes.

"Well, if we're playing that game, then I'm the best temp in Chiswick." She said. The Doctor open his mouth to respond, but Pink beat him to it.

"My name's Rose. Rose Tyler." She said.

"Donna Noble." Donna said, shaking her hand. The doctor frowned.

"That's not fair, why'd you tell _her _your name but not _me?_" He said poutily. Donna frowned. She _really _didn't want to deal with an overgrown child right now.

She sighed and pulled her phone out of her pocket, dialing her grandad's number. Rose and Jack caught on, and started calling people they knew as well. The Doctor stood there, not doing anything.

Her phone rung twelve times before it went to voice mail. Donna frowned.

"Your phones won't work." The Doctor said somewhat smugly.

Rose turned to him, confusion etched on her face.

"What's that supposed to mean?" She said a hint of worry in her voice. The Doctor shrugged.

"When I scanned the elevator, I noticed that there was a signal blocker imbedded in the walls." He said.

"Is that what that silver stick was?" Donna asked crossing her arms. The Doctor looked horrified.

"It's not a silver stick! It's a _Sonic Screwdriver._" He said.

"If you know what he means." Captain Jack said wiggling his eyebrows. The Doctor paled. Rose giggled.

"Don't _do _that! That's disgusting!" The Doctor exclaimed. Jack shrugged.

"Sorry, not sorry." He said. Donna rolled her eyes.

"Oi! You two! Stop flirting for a moment, we have bigger problems!" Donna said. Rose stifled another laugh.

"We _were not _flirting." The Doctor said, putting emphasis on the not. Jack smirked.

"You might not have been, but _I _sure was." He said. The Doctor took an involuntary step back.

"Like Donna said, we have a bigger issue. The doors are deadlocked, and no one knows we're trapped here." He said quickly.

"What's... Deadlocked?" Rose asked. _I'd like to know that too. _Donna thought to herself. The Doctor turned to her.

"It means that my sonic screwdriver won't work on the doors." He explained. Donna frowned.

"What even _is _a sonic screwdriver? It sounds like you made it up." She said accusingly. The doctor looked at her scandalously.

"It's not made up!" He defended. Donna shrugged.

"Whatever." She said.

"Back to the whole, we're trapped in an elevator with no way out thing..." Rose said.

"Hold up. It just occurred to me, how do you have a _sonic screwdriver? _Those won't even be invented until the fiftieth century." Jack said, eyeballing the device still clutched in The Doctor's hand.

Rose, Donna and The Doctor looked at him surprised. _Fiftieth century? _Donna thought.

"How do you know that?" The Doctor asked, sticking the sonic device back into his jacket, eyeing Jack suspiciously. He shrugged.

"Ex Time Agent, just like you, I assume." He said. The Doctor rose an eyebrow suspiciously.

"I'm not a Time Agent, nor have I ever been." He said, in a slightly offended tone.

"Then where'd you get the sonic tech? It's not like you're some kind of alie- oh." Jack said, losing some of his bravado.

Donna looked at each of them in turn. They were obviously both delusional, or quite possibly insane, but she was still curious as to the captain's last comment.

"What... What was that?" Rose asked Jack curiously. He glanced at Rose and Donna and then back at The Doctor.

"So... Where you from? Myseone? Kio? Clom? Those are the only planets to have sonic in _this _century." Jack said. _Planets? This century? What _are _they going on about? _Donna thought worriedly.

"Well I'm not from Clom, but I don't think it matters what planet I'm from." The Doctor told Jack. Suddenly, it clicked. _Planet I'm from... _Donna gasped.

"You're an _alien!_" She told him. The Doctor turned to her, an annoyed expression plastered onto his face.

"Yes, yes, _do _try to keep up." He said. Donna made a face at him.

"Well _excuse me _spaceman! It's not every day I get trapped on an elevator with a _Martian!_" She said.

"You know, Donna's got a point." Rose said quietly.

"What are you? Some kind of speciest? I am _not _a Martian!" The Doctor exclaimed, offended. Donna snorted.

"I can't believe this. I'm stuck on an elevator with an _alien._" She said.

"Guys? Can we all go back to the whole, stuck in an elevator thing? I really want out." Rose said, stepping between Donna and The Doctor, who, in their shouting match, had grown quite close in proximity. Donna nodded.

"Fine, but I wanna know if any of the rest of you have some crazy secret first." She said looking at Jack.

"I was born in the fifty first century." He said bluntly, with a little bit of pride laced into his voice.

Donna and Rose looked at each other, the same thoughts running through their brains: _Were they the _only _normal people on this elevator?_

**THERE YOU HAVE IT. Chapter one is finished. So? What did you think? Good? Bad? Ugly? Please leave a review, comment, or CONSTRUCTIVE criticism. Did you like my formatting? I'm in newspaper up at the highschool, so I just kinda want to know what you think. If it's bothering too many people, I can change it. **

** See you next time, where you'll figure out just how and why they're stuck. They'll also work on a plan to escape. And just who put them there? All shall be revealed soon!**

** By the way, did you like the cover? **


	2. HE MAN! WHAT IS HAPPENING!

**_THERE IS A NEW POLE ON MY PROFILE! GO THERE AND VOTE ON MY NEXT FIC! ALL NESSARRY INFO. IS ON THE POLL! _**

**Go vote guys...**

**Annnnd I'm back! I'm really sorry! It's been almost two weeks! D: I hope you enjoyed chapter one. Ignore my formatting comment on my last authors note, fanfiction just does what it wants. -_- ANYWAYS. in this chapter: the gang tries to escape, talk, and annoy Nine. It's always fun to annoy Nine.**

**DISCLAIMER OF DOOM: I am not the proud owner of Dr. Who, but I will be soon! (No I won't...) I also don't own any catchy, annoying, internet songs we all secretly love.**

"So... Shouldn't we be trying to escape?" Rose asked cautiously. Donna nodded.

"I'm working on it." The Doctor said. He had pulled off the access panel on the top of the elevator and was now half in, and half out of it. He held the glowy stick in one hand and was tinkering with the wires in the other.

Donna looked up at him.

"Oi! Spaceman! Get down here, we're going to come up with a _real _plan." She called to him. He looked down at her, an annoyed expression on his face.

"That's what I'm _doing_!" He huffed. "Besides. It looks like someone tampered with the elevator's mainframe." He continued. Donna stared.

"You mean someone wanted us to get stuck _on purpose_?" She said loudly. The doctor rolled his eyes.

"Yes that's what I'm saying!" He said.

"Well who would want us _stuck?_" Donna asked. The Doctor looked honestly perplexed by this, but Donna was having none of it.

"I don't know, and I don't like not knowing." He said finally. Donna began a retort, but Jack stopped her.

"Ok, Doc, the tech stuff isn't working, come on down and lets do this the old fashioned way." He said. The doctor grumbled something unintelligible, but dropped to the floor anyway.

"Ok, let's consider our options: we're stuck, our phones don't work, and someone may have tampered with the elevator. Thoughts?" Jack asked the group, who were now all sitting against each wall of their current prison.

"I have to be home by seven, my boyfriend Mickey's taking me out for dinner." Rose said.

"Rickey? What kind of name is that?" The Doctor asks. Donna wanted to slap him.

"Um... It's _Mickey._" Rose says. The Doctor raises an eyebrow skeptically, but doesn't say anything.

"_Back to our plans._" Donna says pulling the conversation back on track.

"We could climb up on the roof of the thing and look for a ladder." Rose said. The Doctor shakes his head.

"I checked. Too far, we wouldn't make it." He said. Donna and Jack frowned.

"Lemme climb up. I'm going to check." He said.

"I already checked!" The Doctor exclaimed. Jack just smirked.

"Don't care. Now help me up!" Jack said. The Doctor sighed and crouched down, allowing Jack onto his back as he hoisted him up. Jack flashed him a smile.

"Thanks Doc." He said with a wink.

"Quit it." The Doctor grunted as he practically shoved Jack out. Jack let out a squeak of surprise. The Doctor smirked at this.

Donna and the others heard some rustling coming from the roof of the elevator as Jack stood up.

"Weeeellllll... Looks like The Doc was right, you guys wouldn't be able to make that jump." He said. Donna frowned.

"Are you saying you could?" She snapped. The responce she got was the opposite of what she expected.

"Sure, I _could, _but I'd probably snap my neck, and it _really freaking hurts _to have a snapped neck." Jack said.

"You've... Snapped your neck before?" Rose asked, a disbelieving expression on her face.

"Thirteen times, to be precise." Jack called down to them. Donna was going to respond to that. She really, really, was; but then she just rolled her eyes.

She and Rose (possibly the only other human on board, she had _no idea _what Jack was, and quite honestly, she didn't _want _to know.) had only been with them on the elevator for an hour and were already expecting the unexpected.

"Whelp. I'm coming back down! Geronimo!" Jack said as he dropped back into the elevator. His feet hit the floor with a thump, making everybody jump. It was still an elevator after all, Donna didn't even want to think about it if the floor dropped out.

"Geronimo? That has to be _the dumbest _thing I have _ever _head." The Doctor scowled.

"And 'fantastic' is any better." Jack muttered.

"As a matter of fact, it is! ... How'd you even know that? I've only said it once." The Doctor questioned. Jack shrugged.

"Your jacket, _duh._" Jack said. The Doctor looked down at his jacket and then back at Jack.

"I'm not even going to dignify that with a responce!" The Doctor said.

"Guys..." Rose muttered.

"You _just did_!"

"That doesn't even count!" The Doctor snapped back.

"_Guys..._" Rose tried again.

"Hey Doc, pass me your screwdriver, would yah?" Jack asked. The Doctor, who had been holding it all along...? Clutched it to his chest.

"No way. Not after what you said earlier."

"Guuuuuyssss." Rose said desperately.

"WILL YOU TWO STOP IT! ROSE HAS BEEN _TRYING _TO SPEAK FOR AGES." Donna snapped loudly, looking pointedly at the quarreling duo. Jack looked flustered, and The Doctor just looked miffed.

"I oughta slap you two I should..." Donna grumbled.

"I met a woman like that once. _Very _slap happy... All I wanted to do was fix her Telly! There were aliens colonizing it..." The Doctor said, trailing off.

"That was _you?_" Rose gasped. The Doctor turned to her, the confusion evident from the expression on his face.

"My mum was talking about that for _months!_ She got out of the shower on day and saw 'some random bloke tearing apart the Telly mumering about _aliens!_' God, I can't believe that was _you!_" Rose said.

"There were aliens!" The Doctor defended.

"Sorry to break up this lovely chat, but um..." Jack said stepping between Rose and The Doctor. The Doctor turned to him.

"Oh great, you again." He muttered.

"_Real _nice of you Doc, but seriously... _Listen._" Jack said.

Everyone in the elevator shut up. Only then did Donna realize that the elevator was playing music.

*And so I cry sometimes when I'm lying in bed

Just to get it all out what's in my head

And Ie-ee-ee-ee, I am feeling a little peculiar

And so I wake in the morning and I step outside

And I take a deep breath and I get real high

And I scream from the top of my lungs

"What's goin' on?"

And I say hey, yeah, yeah, yeah yay

Hey, yay, yay

I said hey, what's goin' on?

And I say hey, yeah, yeah, yeah yay

Hey, yay, yay

I said hey, what's goin' on?

And he tries

Oh, my God, do I try

I try all the time,

In this institution

And he prays

Oh, my God, do I pray

I pray every single day

Nyaaah (AN: Skeletoooor!)

For a revolution!

And I say hey, yeah, yeah, yeah yay

Hey, yay, yay

I said hey, what's goin' on?

And I say hey, yeah, yeah, yeah yay

Hey, yay, yay

I said hey

(Don't cry out loud)

(Just keep it inside

and learn how to hide your feelings)

(Hey, yeah, yeah, yeah yay)

(Hey, yay, yay)

Hey hey hey

I say hey

What's goin' on?

Yeah!*

"Ok... _WHAT THE LITERAL FUCK WAS THAT._" Jack asked as the song finished. Donna didn't know how to respond.

The elevator had been so quiet up to that point. _What on earth is going on! _She wondered.

**MEANWHILE, THE ONE BEHIND THIS MOST DEVIOUS MASTER PLAN OF MASTER PLAN-E-NESS tm, c, r, exc.**

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Hey, Caan, did you see their faces when I played that? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" The Master shouted gleefully.

"Oh ho ho. I saw it Master. Stupid name though, you're not my master." Caan said, muttering the last part. The Master turned to him.

"Hey, you've seen all of time and space, can you give me some more internet songs?" He asked a malicious glint in his eyes. Caan blinked. That wouldn't be a problem. The internet had _loads _of weird songs.

"How about we start with _Taking the hobbits to Isengard?_" Caan asked. The Master smirked and started to play the music in the elevator.

**BACK TO OUR UNLIKELY HEROES... (WELL, IM PRETTY SURE THEY'RE WHO WE'RE VOTING FOR...)**

After twenty minutes of hearing someone say 'Where's the rum gone?' Donna had had enough. She turned to The Doctor and Jack angrily.

"_You two are going to get us out of here _RIGHT NOW." She said. Jack was considerably paler then before her out burst and climbed onto the elevator roof again. The Doctor started waving the glow-y stick again.

"Maybe we should hit the 'In case of emergency button. I'm fairly sure this counts as an emergency..." Rose said. Donna face palmed.

"Yeeeeeeaaaaaaaaahhh... Probably a good idea." Jack called down. Donna stomped towards the offending button, and pressed it.

Nothing happened.

**AN: AND SO... THE VILLIAN APPEARS! Good gravy, I love The Master, he's an incredibly fun character to write... Also, Dalek Caan? Just what is going on here? Also, PLOT HOLES ALREADY... OH NO! Don't worry, I know they're there, and I'll resolve them shortly... ~.~**

**THANKS TO 53 VIEWS OF THIS STORY! Wow, that blows me away... Thanks for checking this silly thing out!**

**SPECIAL THANKS TO SUPERWHOLOCKAVENGER12! My first follower!**

**Another thing, sorry 'bout the F Bomb, but, really, nothing else would have worked there...**

**_THERE IS A NEW POLE ON MY PROFILE! GO THERE AND VOTE ON MY NEXT FIC! ALL NESSARRY INFO. IS ON THE POLL! _**

**Go vote guys...**


	3. ROSE HAS A PLAN! (Heaven forbid)

**_THERE IS A NEW POLE ON MY PROFILE! GO THERE AND VOTE ON MY NEXT FIC! ALL NESSARRY INFO. IS ON THE POLL! _**

**Go vote guys...**

**HELLO EVERYONE! WELCOME BACK! I'm really sorry about the delay, midterms plus moving plus writers block is no fun at all! I hope you're enjoying the story, why don't you drop a review on the way out? Anonymous reviews are cool too!**

**Any who, THE MASTER DISCOVERED THE INTERNET. god help us all should he ever discovers the teletubbies...**

**Im now doing a shout out thingy... So, shout out to my readers in the UK! And the USA! And finally to my reader(s)? in AUSTRIA! Next time... OTHER countries!**

(Jack POV)

"HHHHEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLPPPP!1!one!" Donna shrieked, pounding on the wall of the elevator. Jack whinced.

"I don't think anyone's coming Donna." He said. _Boy, she's got a mouth, that one. _He thought as he sighed.

Donna mumbled something unintelligible, but she did stop shrieking.

"Great Rassilion! Someone shut this music up!" The Doctor said, covering his ears. Jack had to agree, ten minutes of the Sparta remix with (possibly Voldemort?) laughing was more then he had ever wanted. Sure, it was funny at first, but now? No. Just _no._

"I think we're going to be stuck here a while longer, so how bout we play a game?" Rose asked from her corner of the elevator.

"No way! We need to focus on getting out of here!"

"Sounds fantastic!"

Donna and The Doctor said at the same time. Jack rolled his eyes.

"Look, we pressed the alarm button, and already know we can't get out, a little entertainment sounds great right now." He said calmly, looking at Donna. She frowned, but sat down, as if ready to play.

"So I was thinking truth or dare?" Rose said with a small smirk. Jack flashed one of his smiles that could blind a man one hundred feet away and nodded.

"Let's do it." He said. Donna and The Doctor exchanged a glance, but could think of nothing better to do, so they joined the game too.

"I'll start." Rose said looking at all of them in turn.

Jack had to admit, while she had been one of the quieter passengers who were trapped, that didn't mean she couldn't look like one scary cookie when she held so much power in her hands.

"Jack!" She said loudly, as her head whipped toward him yellow hair fanning out behind her. Then, she asked the dreaded question.

"Truth or Dare?" Jack smirked. He already knew what he would say.

"Dare." He said flashing another brilliant smile. Rose smiled.

"I dare you to... Trade jackets with The Doctor for the next three rounds!" She said finally. Jack blinked. And then blinked again, turning to stare at The Doctor.

"Well ok then!" Jack said slipping off his jacket. This wasn't to tough a dare. The only trouble would be if The Doctor's jacket didn't fit.

The Doctor on the other hand, looked horrified.

"Why does _his _dare involve _my _jacket!" He asked angrily. Rose snorted.

"Cos this is Truth or Dare and I said so, now hurry up." She said. Jack bit back a laugh as he tossed The Doctor his coat.

"But it's _my _jacket! What if it gets... _Cooties_... Or something?" The Doctor whined. Rose glared at him but Donna beat her to the punch.

"Shut up and give him your jacket _spaceman!"_ She said (louder then was probably necessary). The Doctor mumbled something in an alien language, but he then gingerly handed Jack his precious jacket.

"Well then, now that _that _drama's over with, it's _my _turn." Jack said. Everyone grinned, the horrid music in the background temporarily forgotten.

Jack scanned the small space, making eye contact with everyone at least twice. Who to pick? Who to pick? He wondered.

He wouldn't pick Rose, that just wouldn't be classy, he supposed choosing Donna would be alright, but she kinda scared him, and The Doctor... Well... He was kinda odd. Only one choice stood out to him, so he called out their name.

"Donna. Truth or Dare?" He said menacingly. Donna frowned.

"Truth." She said calmly (Well, I _say _calm). Jack nodded. Honestly, he was hoping that she'd choose dare, but... Oh well.

"Have you ever been skinny dipping?" Jack asked. Rose giggled and The Doctor looked like he regretted playing this game at all.

Donna had turned as red as her hair, and that was saying something.

"What the hell kind of question is _that_?" She screeched. Jack shrugged nonchalantly, a smile tugging at his lips.

"I dunno. Curiosity?" He said. Donna spurted something no one could make out and then frowned.

"Yes." She said firmly, as if daring anyone to make a comment. Jack just smiled.

"Well ok then screechy, I believe it's your turn~" he said. Donna crossed her arms and huffed.

"I hate you so much... And I've only known you for two hours!" She said.

"Still your turn." Jack said. Donna scowled at him, but turned to The Doctor immediately. He rose his eyebrows.

"You. Truth or Dare?" She demanded. The Doctor gave her an appraising look, but chose 'dare' in the end.

"I dare you to smell Jack's armpit." Donna said flashing a glare towards Jack. The Doctor looked horrified.

"Why do all of _my _dares or _his _dares involve each other!?" He asked exasperatedly. Donna smirked.

"Why not?" She asked. The Doctor shot her a nasty look but didn't say anything. Jack just chuckled and took off The Doctor's jacket, keeping one sleeve on so as not to lose Rose's challenge.

"This is stupid." The Doctor said.

"Really? I thought you might've said it would be 'fantastic'." Rose said. Suffice to say, everyone but The Doctor laughed.

The Doctor leaned in and sniffed Jack's armpit, and looked somewhat relieved.

"It's a good thing you use deodorant." He said, a challenging glare in Donna's general direction. The red head scowled at Jack.

"Way to ruin my dare Hottie!" She told him sharply. Jack flashed her a smile that made stars look dim and comparison and looked over at The Doctor, who was back again in his corner of the elevator.

"You're up, Doc." Jack told him. The Doctor frowned.

"Don't call me that! ... Rose, Truth or Dare?" He said facing Rose expectantly. Rose looked thoughtful.

"We've already had two dares... I'll go truth!" She said with a smile. The Doctor frowned.

"Hmm... How bout... What's the longest you've gone without a shower?" He asked.

"Week and a half." She said quickly and confidently. Jack felt a little jealous, even he hadn't accepted his dare as quickly.

Donna clapped her hands.

"Who's ready for round two? Rose, you're up." She said. Rose smirked.

"Donna, I choose you! Truth or D-"

"HELLO? ANYONE IN THERE?" Rose was interrupted by a very loud, very obnoxious voice accompanied by a banging noise. Jack and the others stood up.

"YES! WE'RE ALIVE!" Donna shouted to them. Rose snorted.

"YEAHHH, THIS IS THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, RESPONDING TO AN EMERGENCY... WE'LL GET YOU OUT OF HERE REEEEEAL QUICK, BUT UH... THE TELETUBBIES IS ON RIGHT NOW, SOOO... JUST GIVE US AN HOUR OR SO AND WE'LL BE BACK. KAY?" The voice said. Jack could hear it walking off.

_ How could it be walking off though? It's an elevator. Huh. Maybe the author was just lazy and was going for cheap humor rather then a real story. Yeah... That makes sense... Wait... What? _He thought to himself.

"WWWWWWWWHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTT?!" Donna shrieked so loudly it would put a mythological Siren to shame. Jack covered his ears. Ouch.

"WHY YOU GOOD FOR NOTHING- I DEMAND THAT YOU GET BACK HERE! OF ALL THE THINGS- _TELETUBBIES!" _She continued to shout.

Jack sighed. Why did he have to get on this elevator. This ONE elevator, and he had to get on it... Geez... No luck today.

**YOU THOUGHT I FORGOT THE MASTER? NOPE. NOT TODAY... AND NOW, FOR YOUR ENJOYMENT, A LOOK INTO THE MIND OF A DERANGED PSYCOPATH WITH A LONG HISTORY OF VIOLENCE AND MURDER... AND BY LONG HISTORY, I MEAN 900+ YEARS, MAN. 900+ YEARS...**

The Master was getting bored. Sure, it was cool to see The Doctor and his idiotic companions scuttle around an enclosed space with no hope of escape while some ridiculous (even by ape standards) music play in the backround for for an hour or so, but _only _for an hour.

Besides, they were ignoring his _awesome _(horrible) music, _and _playing some lame-o ape game. Fools...

Suddenly, he got an idea. A maniacal grin spread across his face.

"Hey, Caan, we totally have a microphone somewhere around here, right?" He said spinning around and around in his swivel chair.

"I believe so Master." Caan said, a crazy gleam in his one eye. The Master grinned.

"How's about we tell our _friends _we're here, eh?

** AAAAANNNNNDDDDD... THATS A WRAP! Chapter three is finished! Hope that was as fun for everyone to read as it was for me to write. **

** IM SORRY. I have excuses for why this is so late (cough cough RL cough cough), but you don't wanna hear that. I just hope I didn't lose you as a reader... **

** Anyways! Guys? I know you're out there, I check my stats, but, could you ****_please _****drop a review on your way out? Or a follow too, that'd be cool. **

**Thanks to Robin Egg and Vi for the anon reviews, glad you're liking it.**

**Also to Emmy Rain and Hediru for your reviews! I'm makes me so, so, happy that so many people are reading and enjoying my work...**

**THIS IS IMPORTANT! I'm only projecting this story to have two (possibly three) chapters left, so... Yeah.**

** SEE YOU NEXT TIME, WILL BE UPDATED QUICKER THEN THIS CHAPPIE!**


	4. PORQUE? Sorry, the translator broke

**IM SO SORRY I LIED. I TOOK FOREVER TO UPDATE! Anyways...**

** HEY HEY HEY! GUESS WHO'S BACK? Yup. It's meeee. Anywho, After an interesting game of Truth or Dare, out heroes (well, I ****_call _****them heroes...) are about to get an unpleasant surprise... The Master. **

** Yes! For all of you out there who want more then a tiny scene at the end with The Master, you get your wish.**

** I WANT TO MAKE THIS CLEAR: The Doc, as Jack so lovingly calls him, is still in his Ninth incarnation. Big ears, leather jacket, says 'fantastic' a lot. Yeah him. And this Master is the Simm Master. **

** How is that possible? You question questioningly. Cause of unspecified reasons. **

** You'll know soon enough, just be patient~**

** ALSO! Some one in this chappie will be speaking Spanish, (and Italian) and as I used a Babel Fish to translate, I cannot say if it will be accurate or not...**

** With that over with, now for some shout outs!**

**TO MY READERS IN: INDIA! SWEDEN! and ROMANIA! (What's up, yo?)**

**AN UPDATE ON OUR HEROES:**

**JACK HAS (already) FLIRTED WITH EVERYONE (at least twice), THE DOCTOR KICKED A WALL (probably in frustration... Weeelllll, I say probably), DONNA SLAPPED HIM AGAIN (Jack applauded), AND EVERY ONCE AND A WHILE ROSE BROKE THE FORTH WALL.**

(Donna POV)

After the fire fighter left, Donna's mood went down hill fast. Like, really fast. Fast as a train fast. Faster then the Ninth and Tenth Doctors would race for bananas fast. THAT fast.

"I can't _believe _this!" She shouted to no one in particular.

The Doctor was once again messing with his sonic screwdriver, but once again, nothing was happening. Donna mumbled about elephants to herself and scowled at every one but Rose.

Suddenly...

"BZZZT. hola? funciona esta cosa?**(1)** BZZZT." A gravely and high pitched voice called out. Donna and the others leaped to their feet with the exception of the handsome captain, who was already standing.

_Wait... Was that _Spanish? Donna wondered.

"¡Mierda! qué demonios? esto no es Inglés!**(2)**" the voice called out again. Donna looked at the others. Rose looked bewildered, Jack confused, and The Doctor...

_Why does he look like that?_

The man in question had a confused and thoughtful expression on his face. Maybe he could understand Spanish?

"joder joder joder! Caan! No funciona! hazlo funcionar!**(3)**" came the voice again. This time, a fainter distinctly different voice could be heard.

"Me parece que no puede averiguar lo que está mal, maestro.**(4)**" the other voice said in the background.

Donna was still looking at The Doctor. When the second voice spoke The Doctor's eyes widened with recognition but then he shook his head disbelievingly.

"¿Has probado poniéndolo a wumbo?**(5)**" The original voice asked.

"Voy a hacer eso ahora, pero no creo que va a funcionar.**(6)**" the second voice responded. Donna shook her head. Were these guys firefighters? Did they decide that the Teletubbies wasn't that important?

"ok, è fatta, il Maestro.**(7*)**" the quieter voice said. Jack perked up.

"I understood that. That was poorly translated Italian." He said.

"Why do you understand poorly translated Italian?" Rose questioned him. Jack shrugged.

"You never know when it's useful to know poorly translated Italian. Like now, for instance." He said. Donna had to submit to that logic.

"eh !? cosa uguale su ogni ANCORA NON INGLESE CAAN!**(8)**" the first voice screeched. Donna winced.

"What's he saying, Jack?" She asked. Jack frowned.

"He's mad because he's not speaking in English." He said. Donna frowned.

"How does he not know he's speaking Italian? (Poorly translated! Rose threw out.) Can't he just switch to English?" She said flatly. Jack shrugged.

"Probably a nut job." He said.

"oh mio dio! Non riesco nemmeno a capire me stesso! è rovinando il mio ingresso impressionante!**(9)**" The voice cried.

"tecnicamente, Maestro, non ci sono.**(10)**" the other one giggled.

"NON GET SMART CON _ME_ DALEK.**(11)**" The first shouted angrily.

"I feel like I'm in the middle of a soap opera." Rose said smiling. Donna just frowned. She was officially _done _with everyone's shit. From the fire fighters, to the doctor being an alien, Jack being... Jack, Teletubbies, and the two idiots on the intercom... She just wanted to go home. A loud thump was heard as some one kicked something, presumably whatever was translating.

"perché non sarà questo lavoro! ... Sai cosa? Ho finito. Ho finito. fatto, fatto, fatto.**(12)**" the was a sound of someone getting up and stomping away.

There were a few tense moments of silence before suddenly the trapped ones heard things crashing, exploding, someone screaming unintelligibly in Italian, birds squawking, meniacal laughter, wolves howling, someone screaming PORQUE over and over again, (how did that work anyways, weren't they speaking in Italian now?) a loud boom followed by crying, and _opera singing? _Donna decided she really didn't want to know.

"ouch! hai avuto a pugni me così difficile?**(13)**"

"Sono sicuro che non ho idea di cosa tu stia parlando. Io non ho nemmeno le mani.**(14)**"

"Mah. abbiamo intenzione di risolvere questa cosa o no? perché io non voglio farlo con un Dalek intelligente ass.**(15)**"

"sì. cerchiamo di fissare la cosa! il medico non piacerà affatto! è probabilmente una buona cosa che non si può parlare male tradotto italiana, altrimenti aveva di già capito chi siamo.**(16)**" the second voice cheered.

Donna looked over at Jack who was frowning suspiciously in The Doctor's general direction.

"Doc, the voices say that if they weren't speaking in Italian right now, that you'd know who they are." He said. The Doctor frowned.

"I might. Hate to say it, and it isn't all that fantastic, but I've made enemies over the years." He said.

"Ora maestro, premere il tasto blu, seguito dal ripcord verde.**(17)**" The second voice said.

"oh! Vedo! se faccio che in combinazione con lanciare questi interruttori ...**(18)**" the first trailed off.

"poi la luce gialla dovrebbe lampeggiare due volte prima di spegnere!**(19)**" the second one said in its unearthly cackle.

"Ok, the yellow light is off-" the voice began, (in English this time) only to be interrupted by the other one.

"And the pink one is flashing?"

"Yes! I said already!"

"No you didn't."

"Oh shut up!"

"..."

"*sighs* ok continue..."

"And Mermaid Man's belt _is _set to wumbo?"

"Duh!"

"Then they _should _be able to understand us now."

"... DAMMIT CAAN, NOW YOU'VE MADE ME LOOK LIKE AN IDIOT."

"You do that all on your own Master." The second voice said patronizingly. Jack giggled. Only then did Donna notice that he was still wearing The Doctor's jacket.

"Um... Hello? Caan and 'Master'? Who exactly are you?" Rose called up to the ceiling. There was a pregnant pause before...

"I AM SO GLAD YOU ASKED! I am your LORD AND MASTER, THE MASTER." The original, ten times more annoying voice shouted. Evidently, Donna mused, he didn't know you weren't supposed to scream into a microphone. Also, pretentious much?

The Doctor fainted, but no one was paying him any attention. 'The Master' was giggling insanely on the other end of the mic.

"And I'm Dalek Caan." Said the other voice, also giggling, as if in on some big joke.

"AND WE TRAPPED YOU HERE~~~" They sang together.

Donna, Rose and Jack all stared at each other for what felt like six elevanths of an eternity before all Hell broke loose.

**I'm sorry this one isn't as long, I hope the humor makes up for it... ANYWAYS! Donna is so done, isn't she? Oh well! I wanna shout out to all of my reviewers ever so THANKS A MILLION YOU GUYS!**

**TRANSLATIONS:**

1) "hello? is this thing working?"

2)"Shit! what the hell? this isnt English!"

3)"dammit dammit DAMMIT! Caan! It's not working! make it work!"

4)"I can't seem to find out what's wrong, Master."

5)"Have you tried setting it to Wumbo?"

6)"I'll do that now, but it don't think it will work."

**ITALIAN SWITCHAROO~**

7)"ok, it's done, Master."

8)"eh!? what even- STILL NOT ENGLISH CAAN!"

9)"oh my god! I can't even understand myself! it's ruining my awesome entrance!"

10)"technically, Master, you aren't there."

11)"DONT GET SMART WITH ME DALEK."

12)"why won't this WORK! ...you know what? I'm done. I'm done. done, done, done."

13)"ouch! did you have to punch me so hard?"

14)"I'm sure I have no idea what you're talking about. I don't even have hands."

15)"hmph. are we going to fix this thing or not? cause I don't want to do it with a smart ass Dalek."

16)"yeah. let's fix the thing! the doctor won't like that at all! it's probably a good thing he can't speak poorly translated Italian, otherwise he'd of already figured out who we are."

17)"Now master, press the blue button, followed by the green ripcord."

18)"oh! I see! if I do that combined with flipping these switches..."

19)"then the yellow light should blink twice before turning off!"

** NOW THAT YOU UNDERSTAND 78% OF THE HUMOR IN THAT CHAPPIE, LETS TALK. I wanna hear from you guys. Drop a review, even if you have to do it anonymously. It really does make my day. **

** IN OTHER NEWS: Go to Medieval Times. I went with the Band and Orch, and I lost my voice I was screaming so loudly. It's hella fun.**

** TO .Companion.007, I love you. You've read and reviewed two of my works, so I thought I'd give you a special shout out. Ta! (See what I did there? :D )**

**IM OUT! SEE YOU NEXT TIME, AND I ONCE AGAIN APOLOGIZE FOR THE WAIT. **

** THERE IS A POLL ON MY PROFILE, COOKIES FOR ALL WHO VOTE!**


	5. MASTERPLAN BACKFIRES (Donna is to blame)

**OH MY FLYING FISH FROM FLIPPING FRANCE. IM LATE AGAIN. At least I have a reason this time. I live in good ole Oklahoma and its STORM season. We get some huge ass tornadoes, so I've been a little preoccupied. I'm also a beta now, so that's happening. As a bonus: FINALS! So shit on a spider and call me a cooking pot, but at least I have legit reasons this time.**

**BUT YOU DONT WANNA HEAR 'BOUT THAT. You want the story. FAIR WARNING, depending on my mood when I write this, this could be the last chappie on this story. OH NOES! You exclaim! It's ok though, I'm working on a new story... Thanks to everyone who did the poll, it's still open guys! Three more days!**

**^^^ this of course, was the note I was going to send out ****_two and a half months _****ago. I AM SO ****_SO_**** SO sorry. I had reasons, but now I have no excuse. Hopefully this EXTRA LONG chappie makes up for it.**

**Again, sincerest apologies.**

**NOW, SHOUTOUTS: To my readers in RUSSIA! NORWAY! &amp; HUNGARY!**

**And now: DRAMA ENCOUNTERS OF THE THIRD KIND.**

_"And we trapped you here!~~~"_ The Master and Caan giggled.

Steam came out of Donna's nostrils as she ground her teeth. Rose, Jack, and the Doctor backed up. Angry Donna = painful death after all. In fact, angry Donna was worse than painful death. So. Much. Worse.

"_You_ fools trapped me here!?" She shouted. (Us! Rose whispered to The Doctor.) the was a moment of silence while the two dastardly villains contemplated their responce. Soon:

"Yeah, it was us. So... HAH." The Master eventually shouted. Rose watched as Donna clenched her fists together. She was so angry, Rose wouldn't be surprised if she turned green and hulked out then and there.

"WHY YOU-HOW EVEN DARE YOU YOU COMPLETE AND UTTER NIMRODS-I OUGHTA COME UP THERE OR DOWN THERE OR WHERE EVER THE HELL YOU ARE AND GIVE YOU THE WHAT FOR-HOW DARE YOU TRAP DONNA FREAKING NOBLE IN AN ELEVATOR WITH AN IDIOT AN ALIEN AND SOME OTHER THIRD PERSON!" (Me!) Rose said quietly.

Jack was clapping at this point, but how could he not? That was one impressive rant.

The Doctor looked to be on the verge of fainting again, be it the fact that his most favorite enemy was acting like a child on a sugar high or the fact that Donna may have used all the air in the elevator.

Rose had a stomach ache, but no one cared.

"Wow." The Master squeaked.

"Wow." Everyone else including Dalek Caan squeaked back.

"Umm... Anyways, the umm... The uh- the firefighters should be back soon, so yeah I'm just gonna- I'm gonna go." The Master said, thinking that maybe he should skedaddle before the angry redhead inflicted bodily harm upon his person. The Doctor heard someone, presumably The Master getting off of what was likely a swivel chair and backing away from the live feed of all of the people in the elevator.

"OH NO YOU DONT." Donna shrieked, magically pulling her hand out of the elevator, grabbing The Master's favorite hoodie and actually pulling him into the elevator.

_Wait... WHHHHHHHAAAAAAAA?!_ Thought literally everyone ever including all of you people creepily reading about the worst day of Donna's (and possibly Jack's) life.

"Eep! What the-!" The Master shouted confused. Donna was staring at her hand curiously.

"Ok... Who wants to tell me what just happened..." Jack began

"And who the hell is that?" He finished, pointing to everyone's favorite maniac. The Master, who, btw, still looked a little confused, jumped to his feet.

"Ok, who did that? (An why do I think it's the redhead?)" he yelled loudly, waving his hands around wildly.

Donna, who was now no longer looking at her hand (she had accepted the fact that this entire day had made no sense what so ever), stomped up to The Master.

"OK MISTER. I want some _answers_!" She yelled at him. (AN: it should be noted that Donna's face is almost touching The Master's own, she's so up in his biz.)

The Master frowned.

"AAAAAAAhhhhhhghggghgh. Why did this have to happen when I don't look nice!" He said. There was dead silence throughout the elevator. A small Dalek cough could be heard from the intercom.

"Wot." Rose said. The Master gestured to himself.

"Look. Usually when I meet people I dress to impress. No shabby suits for me, no sir-ee; but I didn't think I would be magically pulled into an elevator. That's just ridiculous." He said. Jack smiled.

"Well, I may not like this guy, but I like him!" He extended a hand. "Hello there, cap'n Jack Harkness." He said, flashing a brilliant smile that could make a grown man fall apart into feels. Unfortunately for him, The Master wasn't exactly human.

"Stop it." The Doctor said. Jack groaned dramatically, but did stop. The Master's eyes widened and he spun on his heel to face The Doctor.

"Why, hello there _Doctor._" He drawled. The Doctor frowned, and crossed his arms, still quite uncomfortable in Jack's jacket.

"You're supposed to be dead. I _saw_ you die." He said. Everyone who wasn't an alien glanced over at eachother. The Master leg out a short laugh.

"I've died _plenty_ of times, how was that any different?" He said with a smirk. The Doctor simply threw up his hands in exasperation.

"Why is it every time I meet you you get even crazier?" He asked. The Master just wiggled his eyebrows.

"I've always been this crazy." He said. The Doctor sighed.

"What was to point of all of this, then?" He asked. The Master giggled and spun around, hand hitting Rose in the face. (Ow...)

"Does there have to be a point? Maybe I just wanted to mess with you all!" He said.

"You're an idiot." The Doctor continued, glancing at Rose to make sure that she was ok.

"You _wound_ me Doctor dearest!" The Master pouted.

"And you trapped me in an elevator!" The Doctor shot back.

"sHUT Up." Donna said, scaring both 900+ year old aliens.

"We have a bigger problem. We all know we're stuck until the firefighter's telletubby marathon is over, so that leads to the big question: where the _hELL_ is he going to _sit!_" Donna asked crossing her arms.

Everyone froze. There were only four walls and four corners and no one wanted to share their space.

"One two three nOTmE." Rose shouted touching her nose. Donna and Jack's fingers rushed up and hit their own noses quicker then Zorro can cut Zs into people's shirts.

The Doctor, slow on the uptake, looked at the three humans.

"What are you doing?" He asked. Jack shrugged.

"Looks like he's sitting with you, Doc." He said normally. The Doctor looked at everyone.

"Wait, wait, wait, wait. Why me?" He asked growing even more confused. The Master rolled his eyes.

"You didn't touch your nose... Idiot." He said, muttering the last part.

"Oi! I am _not_ an idiot!" The Doctor proclaimed loudly. (Not as loudly as Donna would, but, gee wiz, can anyone even come _close_ to her?)

"Coulda fooled me." The Master said.

"Well at least I didn't design an elevator trap with no escape even for the one who created it!" The Doctor said smugly. The Master frowned and Jack whispered softly:

"Ooooo. Burn." Rose giggled at him.

"Ok! Ok! Everybody _shut up._" Donna said, breaking the two men apart.

"You." She said pointing at The Master, "are sitting with the Doc, and You." She directed at Nine, "are not going to complain." She finished with a nod.

"Fine." The Doctor said childishly as The Master sauntered over and took a seat in the corner.

After that was settled, silence once again settled upon the group.

"So…" The Master said, breaking the silence.

"Im bored." he continued.

"Lets play a game." he finished. Jack nodded his head in agreement. it did get pretty boring, all this waiting and no fun.

"I suggest a game." Rose said, a scary smirk on her not-so-scary face. The corner where she sat suddenly looked darker and so much more terrifying.

Donna gulped. Rose could be really scary sometimes.

"This game… is known as… _paranoia._" Rose continued, a mad glint in her otherwise not very crazy eyes.

Jack, apparently not able to read the atmosphere, smiled a smile so bright, it knocked twenty seven birds out of the sky and dissipated the dark aura surrounding everyones favorite pink and yellow human.

"Sounds like fun." he said. Rose smiled.

"you have no idea. Basically, you whisper a question to the person on your right and they have to respond with the name of someone playing the game. The catch is that only the people who asked and answered it know the question. then, you toss a shoe in the air, and if it lands face up, you have to say the question out loud." Rose said.

Donna smirked.

"Let's play." she said. Rose grinned and the game began.

**-The Chapter was going to end here, but you all deserve more-**

Captain Jack Harkness watched anxiously as Rose leaned over and whispered something to Donna. Donna frowned a bit, and the said:

"Jack." Jack looked up. what had Rose asked? Why him? was it a question of who was the hottest? most attractive? coolest?

Donna threw the shoe. it landed face down. Damn. now he'd never know. and it sure didn't help that Donna looked relived and Rose looked disgruntled.

Donna leaned toward him.

"Oi. You. If you had to choose, who in here has the worst fashion sense?" she asked him. Jack smirked. he was still wearing The Doctor's jacket, and it, while comfortable, was not to attractive.

"The Doctor." He said. The Doctor jumped and tried to ascertain what had been asked.

Jack picked up Donna's shoe, a classy leopard printed flat with a tiny bow, and tossed it. He could see The Doctor staring at it. The shoe flew through the air like a flightless bird, and fell to the ground with a satisfying plop. Damn. Face up.

"The question was: who has the least amount of fashion sense?" Jack said. what happened next no one expected. The Master started cracking up and The Doctor looked embarrassed.

"Oh! They've got you _pegged_ Doc! And this isn't even your worst choice!" The Master choked.

"Now, don't you star." The Doctor growled.

"You're not even wearing the celery! or the 18 foot scarf!" He continued. Jack rose an eyebrow. 18 foot scarf? Celery? What the hell.

"OK. MOVing oN." The Doctor said kicking The Master in the shins.

"Jack! I believe it's your turn!" He said somewhat desperately. Jack shrugged. well, ok then. He leaned toward The Master.

"If you could shave the hair off of someone here, who would it be?" he asked. The Master smiled a toothy smile.

"Why, you of course!" he said. Jack's jaw dropped.

"Wow, rude!" He said. The Master laughed and threw the shoe. It landed face up. Jack scowled.

"He asked me who's head I'd rather shave." he said. Donna grinned.

"I may hate your guts, but I'd have to agree." She said.

"I second that." Rose said. Jack frowned and threw his arms up to the elevator ceiling dramatically.

"Is this whole world against me?!" he shouted.

"Yes." everyone said. Jack scowled.

"I don't think i want to play this game anymore." He said, shoving his hands into his jacket pockets. The only problem was the fact that both of his arms went in to.

"WHAT THE HELL." He said loudly, head on the floor, only his shoulders visible. Donna and Rose both looked at The Doctor suspiciously. He paled.

"Oh yeah. Forgot to tell you, the pockets are bigger on the inside." He said.

"What does that even mean!" Jack said, pulling both of his arms out of the pockets. The Master and The Doctor just looked at each other, having a silent argument. Finally, an agreement seemed to be reached.

"You wouldn't understand, even if we told you." The Master proclaimed with a shrug. Jack frowned, but didn't say anything.

Silence (once again, Cheesus Crust), fell upon the group. Rose looked deep in thought.

"Say… How deep do those pockets go? What's in them?" She asked. The Doctor shrugged.

"Infinite, I think." he said.

Jack put his hands back into them. Then, he began to pull things out.

A yoyo, a paperclip &amp; a piece of string, a signed poster of Freddie Mercury, three bananas (Oh! I forgot those were in there! yum), a bag of marbles, several hats, something no one, not even The Doctor, could identify; a coconut, and a rubber duck.

This time, a shocked silence enveloped the elevator. it was broken by Rose, who leaped to her feet and grabbed the poster, and putting it into her corner of the elevator.

"ITS MINE!" She yelled at The Doctor. He rose his hands in mock surrender.

"Ok, sure." He said.

"Was that all that was in there?" Donna asked. Jack shook his head.

"Not even close." He said.

"There was a mess of fabric at one point." He said.

"Well, pull it out!" Donna said. Rose and The Master snickered, Jack smirked, and Donna looked mortified.

"As you wish, my lady." Jack said with a flourish, arm once again in the pocket. Then, his eyes brightened.

"Got it." He said. Then he hoisted a _giant scarf_ out of the pocket. The Master began to laugh, and The Doctor buried his head in his hands.

"You kept that scarf in your _pockets?_" He guffawed. The Doctor frowned.

"How long is this thing, anyway?" Jack asked, as he continued to look for an end of the scarf. By now, a pile had formed on the ground. The Master looked over at The Doctor.

"Has that thing… _grown?_" He asked. The Doctor shrugged.

"Probably." He said. Jack, meanwhile, still had not reached the end.

"How long is this thing!" He exclaimed. The Doctor put his finger on his lower lip in thought.

"Anywhere between fifty and sixty meters." He said.

"WHAT!" The group shouted.

"Thats long enough to get out of here!" Donna exclaimed. Everyone looked at each other.

"She's right." Jack said, with a smile that brought twenty grown men to their knees for no reason, and made a dolphin leap thirty feet into the air.

Jack finally reached the end of the scarf. Holding it above his head, he shouted:

"The EEEENNNNNND!" Donna frowned.

"Well get up on that roof and lets finish this!" She said. Jack nodded and hoisted himself up onto the elevator roof, tying the scarf to the cables.

"All set!" He called down. Donna grinned.

"Hey guys, before we do this, can I have all of your numbers? I want to keep in touch." Rose asked. Jack stuck his head through the opening at the top of the elevator.

"Sure, mines 036-SEXY" He said. everyone stared at him.

"It is not." Donna said finally. Jack pouted.

"It is too. I paid extra for it. (Why does no one ever believe me?)" He said. Donna just groaned.

"Only _you_ would pay money so that your phone number would have 'sexy' in it." she said scathingly. Jack just smiled.

"Well, _my _number is 338-0998" Donna said, hand on hips. Rose nodded and wrote both numbers down. She looked expectantly at the two aliens.

"Don't have a phone, well, not one that works anyways." The Doctor said. The Master scoffed.

"His number is 1800-THE-DOCTOR" He said. Donna and Jack shared a meaningful look.

"Its worse then yours."

"I am defeated." They said at the same time. The Doctor just pouted.

"Yeah, well, at least my number isn't VOTE-SAXON" He said. Donna just stared at The Master incredulously.

"Why would your number be vote Sax- Oh my god." She said, staring at The Master in a new light.

"You're Harold Saxon. The Prime Minister." She said. He grinned.

"Fun times." He said simply. The Doctor (who is still in his 9th incarnation, mind you), stared at him.

"There won't be a Harold Saxon as Prime Minister until the year 10,009. And he most certainly isn't human." He said.

"One, that hasn't happened yet, two, where have you been for the past year? Saxon won by a land slide (I voted for him)." Donna said. Rose looked at The Doctor.

"I… I thought _Harriet Jones_ was Prime Minister?" Rose asked. The Doctor nodded.

"Same here." He said. Donna and Jack stared at him.

"She hasn't been in two years, Saxon is." Donna said. The Master rose his hand mockingly.

"Um… No I'm not. I haven't been the Prime Minister in quite a while. Your last incarnation made sure of _that _Doctor." He said bitterly to The Doctor.

The Doctor stared at him.

"The last time i saw you, you were into shades and trench coats?" He said, more like a question then as an answer. The Master shivered.

"Lets not talk about those times." He said. Jack looked around at everyone.

"Ok. Lets all just answer this: What year is it?" he asked, eyeing the group.

"2005." said Rose.

"2008." said Donna.

"2010." said The Master.

"2005." said The Doctor.

"… 2009." said Jack.

Everyone paled, including The Master. This wasn't part of the plan.

Rose and The Doctor, who had said the same year, looked at each other, while Donna and Jack looked at everyone. The Master was looking at a spot on his shoe.

"What is going on?" Rose asked fearfully.

"I don't know." The Doctor replied.

**GREAT GOOGLIY MOGGILY. WHAT IS GOING ON HERE? FIND OUT NEXT TIME!**

**DISCLAIMER: ****DO NOT**** try to call any of the phone numbers mentioned in this chapter! Thank you!**

**ALSO! 68% of this chapter was written in two days, SO THE NEXT UPDATE WILL NOT TAKE TWO MONTHS. (sorry about that, I really am.**

**SO THE MASTER HAS JOINED OUR QUARTET! how lovely. Really though, he's such a fun character to write! AND WHAT NONSENSE IS THIS? why are our heroes out of time? what is going on?**

**Hey, to be honest, I'd like to know that too.**

**THANK YOU to my reviewers! It means a lot guys!**

**_HEY GUYS, I THINK THIS STORY IS GOING TO BE LONGER THEN WHAT WAS PLANNED, WOULD YOU LIKE THAT?_**

**_POLL ON PROFILE_**


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